Garth Brooks croons that we should show our loved ones every day how much we love them in his classic song, “If Tomorrow Never Comes.”
I agree, but there’s no reason to actually say it every day.
I believe it’s important I verbally convey “I love you” so that knowledge underpins my relationships, but I do not feel compelled to share those words every time I see those people.
What is the point? They know I love them. If that changes, I’ll be sure and indicate otherwise.
Of course, I’m being a little harsh and melodramatic. I’ll return the “I love you” when my mother, aunt or grandparents call or when Gary or other loved ones or dear friends say it. Sometimes I’ll initiate it because I understand the exchange is coming down the pike anyway, and I don’t want them to feel terrible about always saying it first.
But I refuse to be one of those people who, for example, should the unfortunate tragedy present itself in my life, beats herself up because she did not tell her husband she loved him that morning before he drove to work and died in an automobile accident. (Sorry, Babe, but you killed me off in one of your columns once, so now we’re even!)
I would have more important things to do like morph into a mad, inconsolable woman, wrought with despair and grief over the horrific loss in general.
My husband says I’m not exactly the most romantic woman in the world. Thanks. I concur with your assessment.
He, on the other hand, is thoughtful and sweet, always remembering my birthday, going out of his way to let me pick the restaurant, or surprising me with gifts or pick-me-up text messages. I kind of feel bad for him.
The flip side to that coin, though, is my practicality, which he does appreciate immeasurably.
For example, in the market for a new car — the 2005 Taurus had 210,000 miles on it — we looked online at the pros, cons and prices of new cars, and settled upon a model. We knew what we wanted, called around until we found a dealer who had one and went and bought it.
The sales lady asked at one point, “Would you like to take it for a test drive?”
“Nope, we’re good,” I said. “It’s a new car. I’m sure it drives fine.”
There was a 20-minute period of time at one point during the process where we would have just been sitting around, so we did test drive one of the models — and, of course, I was not surprised.
Yup. Just like I thought. Drove just fine.
Several family members were impressed that we were in and out of the deal in two hours, saying it takes them all day to car shop.
Not when you’re us.
One more example of my direct approach is when we decided to get married more than 12 years ago. I possessed no desire for even a small wedding — I just wanted a quick deal. We drove to Gatlinburg (I did want a honeymoon), paid a photographer and a minister, and said our vows in front of the fireplace in the cabin in which we were staying.
We had looked online at our options, knew what we wanted and booked it.
On our wedding day, the ceremony was overwith in just a few minutes, a perfect amount of time when all you can think about is how you can’t wait to get out of the stupid dress and get back to normal.
We also kept our wedding day dinner simple: A large hamburger, fries and a Coke at the Hard Rock Cafe.
What more do you need?
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to figure out which movie to watch, “When Harry Met Sally” or “Rambo.” I think I’ll go with “Rambo.”
Lora Abernathy is the content manager of the Wilmington News Journal. She can be reached at 937-382-2574 or on Twitter @AbernathyLora.